Sunday, September 14, 2008

broken-heart

I regret my coward act of not showing and telling her my true feelings. There’s no such thing as secret love, indeed. And so I have to suffer the pains of great memories we’ve been through as friends, as she’s now with somebody else.

I was hurt. I blamed myself for that ‘loss’, for not doing anything to have her. I did crazy things to move on. And I was surprised because I’m hurting myself to the limits, for more than two weeks now. My first broken-heart experience, indeed, but I opt to stop my litanies here. I am done and over with my self covenant of waiting for her. She has decided, and I am free.

Lessons learned: enjoy being in solitude, and enjoy being with somebody you feel like hanging on; always forgive yourself; wish the person all the best, don’t curse; pamper yourself with a fresh bath every night; just cry when you feel like crying, and smile afterwards; love the Lord still...

" I never knew until that moment how bad it could hurt to lose something you never really had. " ~ From the television show The Wonder Years †